february: a month for love

it is evening here where i sit right now. i spent the day working on secret midnight press projects, just ate a light dinner with a glass of red wine and i'm sitting here, breathing deeply, reflecting on the moment.

at this moment the sun has already set on february first. february is a month i often dread. although it is the shortest month of the year, it seems to last the longest here in the midwest. winter is still alive and well & the world seems to be most often covered in a heavy grey.

february is often associated with valentine's day. candy aisles are brimming with pink hearts and chocolates and a chubby little angel ready to strike the heart with a romance arrow.

to the greeting card industry: valentine's day is a goldmine.
to me: valentine's day is an opportunity.

this holiday often reminds people that they're single, and this reminder isn't always welcome. it often reminds people that they can't afford to spoil the one they love, or that they can't even love the one they love. it's easy to look at all of the heart balloons and jewelry ads and feel a tinge of loneliness, a wave of emptiness, a whisper of inadequacy.

but here's what i propose: let this month be about love. if not romantic, let it be about kindness toward strangers, encouragement toward loved ones, gentleness with yourself.

if you don't have someone to take out to an overpriced dinner, spend the day doing your favorite things. reach out to an old friend. catch up with a family member you haven't seen in too long. give the server a larger tip than usual, smile at strangers, carry bottled water to hand out to the homeless.

valentine's day doesn't have to be about romance. go to a yoga class, get a massage, get your nails done if that's your thing. or find a friend to take a road trip to a concert with you. treat. yo. self.

because you deserve it.

you are more loved than you could ever know. you deserve the world. the sooner you believe this, the sooner you'll find healing. through this healing, your light will shine on everyone around you.


Listening to:

Gregory and the Hawk - Boats & Birds

(artwork is not my own)


  1. I love this, Ashley. I often overlook valentine's day because there's nothing in it for me yet. but instead I can see it as an opportunity to think of others more and to try harder to love myself. I can spend time doing things I love. too often I hate myself but I pray that this month will be about love. — thank you.

  2. Oh, Ashley.

    I come to your blog for words of peace and reconciliation with itself.
    February is disturbing and uncomfortable month. The new year is already over. From yard of our district yesterday workers removed the tree., and now the most Golden time for postcards and stuff with toy's hearts. Hard to believe that 14.2 in particular, and February is generally devoted to love.

    For me, the month of love is March. Not because of the cats. Because anniversary :-) Actually, you know, the difference of cultures is manifested in the fact that in our country to talk about love to itself is considered almost shameful. historically. And your posts are like a breath of fresh air.

    I think I'll do something for you and your family besides the fact that I do like mammy.

    Once again - thank you Ashley. I am happy that heard your voice in the sea of human voices oneday.

  3. Thanks for this. My friend is single and i think showing her this will help her not feel upset.

  4. love the initiative, I'm super pro love and kindness, I'm convinced a simple gesture can do wonders, we need to be kind to kind so yeah, this is a lovely idea to promote

  5. Thank you for really making me think, I will try to think of it this way. This is a great idea and mindset to have

  6. That is so pleasant to read such lines and feel your kindness like confetti around me.

  7. This is such an amazing mindset to try and adopt. Valentines day has never been meaningful or important in my eyes because I am perpetually single and my dog's birthday is the day before which is much more important. However, looking at the day this was could be really meaningful and so much more fun. Thank you for writing this.

  8. It's just a great story. You are not only a good blogger, but also a very talented writer.

  9. Wow! Your post is so positive. it feels like that you are filled with love, hope and kindness.