the creative burden


there's this ache. this longing. a hollowness within ourselves that hurts like hunger when you haven't eaten in days and the smell of fresh bread taunts you. 

it feels sometimes like there's something inside burrowing deeper and deeper, clawing its way through your core. you think you must be crazy. you must be just tired or lonely or you ate something strange. 

maybe it's lack of sleep. or maybe it's the weight of wonder left behind from childhood, a lingering sense of curiosity, constantly questioning what could be. 


you were created to create. it's survival in its simplest form. we are given tools and to not use them is to not live. 

when you're young everything seems possible. and then years pile on you like bricks burying you. fear can take the form of a nine to five. the tools you were given gather cobwebs and dust until they're nearly unusable.


the hollowness fills with smoke and somehow you're empty and filled the brim at the same time. you have to bleed the infection out. 

relieving this burden isn't always paint brushes on canvas or fingers on piano keys. it's not always ink on paper, it's not always hands molding clay. sometimes it's cupcakes and sometimes it's tomatoes growing out of watered earth. it's a giggling baby, cupboards made from cedar trees, the perfect pasta primavera.



there's this ache. and we have the tools to cure it right in front of us. pick them up. create something out of nothing & your purpose will unfold like a flower in front of you. 

like clouds fill only to fall apart, we need to bleed in order to nourish new life.

you are here to hurt and you are here to help. here is the sign you've been waiting for.

now go.



xo,
Ashley



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7 comments:

  1. "you were created to create" I'm enamored with that phrase and kinda wanna get it tattooed on my forearm

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  2. This is so validating to see that others think and feel and survive the way I do. Not everyone gets it.. I think it's just the soul of the artist. The blessing, the burden. Thank you. Your posts are so beautiful.

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  3. this is my favourite post by far. i had chills the whole time i read it. absolutely beautiful and inspiring (:

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  4. Thank you. You have inspired me in so many ways. Because of you I made the choice to follow my dream of being a writer. Thank you, dear friend, keep creating. <3

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  5. i really needed this. im in the middle of something great and i know now how to finish it, thank you. Xx

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  6. today I had a two hours conversation with my friend about purpose, about doing something about it, doing something to unfold it, this post added up to that feeling, I feel hopeful today, the day by day it's the hard part but as you said you have bleed in order to nourish new life.

    ps: thanks for the photos, clouds and the sky are my favorite things.

    have a lovely week, lovely you.

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  7. I was sitting at my desk with my sketchbook open on my lap. but I didn't know what to fill the white page with. so I started looking on the internet for inspiration. and then I got lost in the maze that is the internet, as it always goes and I couldn't find a way out, back to the empty page in my sketchbook. this is basically what happens a lot of times when I want to create something. and then my wanderings brought me to your blog. thanks a lot for your blog! I don't know how it happened, but now there's this image of a fish looking up to me from that specific page from my sketchbook. it's not a pretty fish, it's actually quit messy, Picasso could have done it a thousand times better. but it's my fish, I somehow created it, with your help, so what does it even matter :D creating is fun, I hope there will always be people like you who remind me to create, so I'll never stop, no matter how hard it is to continue.

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