wanderings

Hi, my loves. It's Wednesday and we're here in this little space again together and this makes my heart happy.



I'd like to start out with a quick public service announcement:

I will still be posting each Wednesday as well as one bonus post each week. Make sure you subscribe here so you don't miss a beat.

Moving right along...


If it's okay, I would love to let you in on the past few weeks of wandering around Europe.

It's been absolutely incredible. It's been such a whirlwind that I've hardly had time to step back and process it.

Andrew and I left our little home in Columbus, Ohio three weeks ago today to head to NYC. we spent a few days there with family and watched my brother perform twice in front of a sold-out Madison Square Garden. Pretty surreal stuff.



From New York we headed to Paris. It was my second time in Paris and it was just as magical as I remembered. I can't explain it, but being there just makes me feel all glowy inside. I love it so much. Our flights are round-trip from Paris, so we'll be back there at the end of our trip. I can't wait.


Next we flew to Florence, Italy. So much beauty in one little city, it's unreal. It was hot, and our Airbnb didn't have air conditioning, but that didn't diminish the wonder we felt wandering through this old, historical city. Such delicious food, nice people, and stunning sights.



After Italy was Amsterdam. Actually, we stayed outside of Amsterdam in a cottage in a town called Leiden. This sleepy little town was such a welcome after two bustling cities. We'd head into Amsterdam for the day and come back to a peaceful, quiet sunset over the canals.



We packed up all of our things again and flew from Amsterdam into London Heathrow. A bus then delivered us to the Reading Festival where we met up with friends and watched my brother perform. We were able to travel with them to Leeds Festival and watch a crowd catch fire once again as Twenty One Pilots performed their hearts out. Always an amazing experience.



We've made our way to London and are camped out here this week. I love this city, and it's had by far the best vegan food I've had on this trip. This city inspires me. I feel so ready to create, so ready to grow and build and be better.

Next, we're off to Dublin, Ireland. Getting in touch with my roots & what looks like some gloriously grey weather. It'll suit my weary soul.



So, here's the deal. I've always wanted to do a trip like this - exploring new cities and learning more and more about myself along the way. I've dealt with flight anxiety for awhile and being away from home hasn't always been easy. I actually worried quite a bit about this trip for months. I even thought about cancelling it. I was sure that the stress would build up over the days and weeks and panic attacks would crush my spirit. But you know what? Three weeks in and I've felt better than I have in months. I feel like myself.

Having both anxiety and depression at the same time is incredibly difficult. Depression kills any motivation to do anything while anxiety is pounding away telling me all of the things I should be doing, all of the things I'm missing out on. It's a vicious cycle. For me, this cycle is often brought on by too much down-time.

Traveling breaks this cycle for me. It keeps my mind preoccupied and my perspective fresh. It reminds me how huge the world is. How many people are out there feeling all of these feelings with me.

It hasn't all been stunning sunsets and sparkling city lights. There have been nights where I can't sleep, days running between airports and train stations, getting lost and just wanting to lay down on the ground and cry. But overall these challenges have shown me the most important thing: I can do this. 


Standing up against anxiety and depression and proving wrong the lies they tell you is the most empowering thing. So if there's something you want desperately and something inside of you is telling you you're not good enough, I'm here to tell you it's not true. Chase after what makes you feel alive. Fight for your joy, for your freedom.

You can do this.

xo,

Ashley


Listening to:

Bishop Briggs - Wild Horses

12 comments:

  1. i love your blog so much. i subscribed and i can't wait for the bonus posts every week!

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  2. "I can do this." Thank you Ashley. You put things so beautifully ❤️

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  3. this is so uplifting. i'm starting university in two weeks and i'm terrified, even though it's something i've wanted to do for the majority of my life. i'm going to a different place than i'd hoped for, so although half my family lives in the city i'll be in (liverpool) i don't actually know it very well and i'm not good with big cities anyway. i have anxiety too, mostly social but also about travel. if you can fly across the world despite battling anxiety, i can travel a few hours away from home <3 thanks ashley

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  4. This is exciting, Ashley, and inspiring as per usual :] it's good to hear about your travels and what you're learning. thank you for sharing with us! I'd love to travel someday, see the different cities and countries, soothe my restless soul a bit. ~for now, this will do! thank you!

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  5. After you're done with your travels I'd love a post on all the restaurants, shops, landmarks, etc. that you saw and think are worth sharing! It was may first time going to Europe this summer and I can definitely relate to what you said in this post. When I'm traveling, seeing, and trying new things I feel like myself. I feel like I can get out of my own head. And ever since I came back home all I can think about is when I'll be going back. So thank you for this post Ashley. btw I subscribed and cannot wait for the bonus posts each week! Take care love 💖

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  6. This makes me feel all of the feels that I could ever feel. ❤️

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  7. Thank you so much. I can't say it enough... thank you, dear sister. I eagerly await your next post. All the love. <3

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  8. I'm super glad to hear you're feeling like this, it sounds amazing, every time I read your posts I read them with a peaceful voice because that is what your words make me feel, peace. I know it's random but it's always good to say something nice, hope you keep having the time of your life, enjoying those beautiful places.

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  9. I've been reading your blog since the beginning and have never felt the need to react because I didn't really know what to say, but this one speaks to me on so many levels.
    You say this vicious cycle id brought by too much down time and I couldn't agree more as it is the same for me.
    I guess I just wanted to tell you that you're a blessing to this world because you put my thoughts in words. And so is your brother: I've been travelling a lot to see him and Tyler perform (including Reading and Leeds as well!) And there are so many times when all the planning and flights and trains and money issues scare me to death, but in the end I always push through because I know traveling and seeing shows is what I need and what helps me get through the rest. So yeah. Thank you and sorry if this doesn't make a lot of sense, I just needed to get it out :).

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  10. I love the the idea of traveling and seeing the world but then the thought of leaving my little nook overwhelms me, I was lucky enough to travel to Greece a few years ago and I remember waking up in the dead of night and I was breathing very harshly and freaking out about traveling and all I wanted to do was cancel my ticket and not travel. I pushed myself but it was hard and it's something that I will continue to strive to work on. I know I'm a little behind on your posts ( catching up now ) but I subscribed so that when life/ work gets overwhelming and things slip my mind, your blog won't be one. ;)

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  11. hey, I love your blog. I'm from Belgium, you should come to visit this country =) it will be so cool to meet you :o My english is not good but I wanted to let you a comment :)I have a lot of anxiety and flight anxiety is one of them. I don't travel so much but when i'm in a plane i'm panicking. two weeks ago I was in a plane to come back from barcelona to belgium and there was a problem with the wings, so we had an hour delay and when we finally took off I was totally stressed out and thanks to josh and tyler my anxiety at this moment has reduced.

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  12. hey, I love your blog. I'm from Belgium, you should come to visit this country =) it will be so cool to meet you :o My english is not good but I wanted to let you a comment :)I have a lot of anxiety and flight anxiety is one of them. I don't travel so much but when i'm in a plane i'm panicking. two weeks ago I was in a plane to come back from barcelona to belgium and there was a problem with the wings, so we had an hour delay and when we finally took off I was totally stressed out and thanks to josh and tyler my anxiety at this moment has reduced.

    ReplyDelete

 

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